Oh, yes, I do get your mail.
And every once in a great while I attempt to answer a few of your questions.
Q: What’s your biggest pet peeve about restaurants?
-E.A., Brooklyn, NY
A: I’d have to say it’s offering me a “doggy bag” at the end of the meal. Really.
Q: How many times do you try a cat food before writing a review?
-A.W., Minneapolis, Minn.
A: Normally once is enough. If it doesn’t bowl me over within the first couple of bites, I generally don’t give it a second chance.
Q: How did you get your start in this line of work?
-G.A., Smileyberg, Kan.
A: I was born. And I’ve eaten cat food ever since.
Q: Where else can we follow your prose?
-N.B., Eagle Lake, Texas
A: Besides the blog? I’ve just submitted my magnum opus to Ball of String Magazine. Wish me luck, and cross your fingers. I would if I could.
Q: Do you have to a wear disguise when you go into a restaurant or pet food store for a review?
-K.T., Empire, Colo.
A: Occasionally I can go as a British Shorthair or a Persian. But at the end of the day, I am what I am. Nobody is going to mistake me for, say, the Woodchuck Food Critic.